Updated: Nov 10, 2022
I've come a long way from being uninspired in some areas of my life. Last year I got to a point of simply asking God for help because I could not figure my life out and why I felt such a funk. Thinking about the journey of getting to this point of asking, I began to see how the trials and hardship in my life were some of the most pivotal moments that are now worth celebrating. These experiences didn't just change me. They moved me. They all caused to me to get up and go in search of something. They also caused me to address things in my life that I would ordinarily run from and face myself.
I didn't immediately start to question things but I started to move in the direction of asking. I moved further and further away from where I thought I should be in life to diving deeply into the big open realm of the unknown that scares people. When I first dove into the big unknown it was scary because one never knows what's coming at them. We might expect things to hit us, hurt us, scar us even. But God is always merciful whenever I've stepped out to take a risk. The realm of the unknown is where the gift you are about to receive from God is also unknown.
What God sends instead is what is tailor made for me to get me to the next level of success. I didn't know I needed a husband after divorce. I ran away for two weeks after Ernest asked me out. In Ernest, God gave me His best. The life I lead now would not be possible if He didn't send me this particular man. I didn't know that in all of these years of writing letters to people that it would move me to keep writing, tapping into my Spirit to encourage and love so many people. I hope to write to more people in different countries. I didn't know that when my house flooded so many times and I had to keep living in hotels for extended periods of time that it was practice for this life that I lead. It was so upsetting every time I had to go to a hotel until I realized that God was up to something. I had to wait to see what He would do with that experience.
Maybe it's time again to sit and stare at this some more. Don't just ask. Get up, seek and knock: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7:7